INFINITE CHOICES
What You Miss
A or B?
This is the situation we find ourselves in most often when making a decision — especially the bigger ones.
Quit or stay?
Take the new job or not?
End my relationship or stay with them?
Move to Peru or stay here?
Write that book or not?
Ham or cheese sandwich?
We look at the most apparent options in front of us and contemplate between those.
Our decision process is often similar to fortune-telling. We imagine alternative realities often far in the future as a result of choosing A or B today.
What I be able to make a career and get a nice apartment in 10 years from now if I stay with this job now?
Will I be with someone loving and caring who shares my interests in 5 years if I break up mit my partner now?
Will I find eternal happiness if I eat the cheese sandwich?
But the thing is, there isn’t just A and B.
I don’t decide between staying or quitting.
I decide between
staying + not changing anything, or
telling my boss she’s a bitch, or
applying for another role, or
starting to communicate differently, or
asking for a raise, or
saying no more often, or
saying yes more often, or
starting a side-project at home,
…
and quitting + (make up your own things).
The point is, my choice isn’t only between A and B. It’s between A and B and every tiny variation of either as well as many other choices I can’t even think about at the moment.
A and B simply are the most obvious ones.
And now, this infinity of choices is being re-created at every new decision point — which is basically every single day.
Keep on doing the same thing? Make a small change? Make a big change? Which one?
We are being paralysed by the decision we have to make between A and B today — because we believe it will dictate where we will end up in the future…
… when in reality, there will come infinitely more opportunities to make choices that will influence our future.
Obviously, some choices matter more than others. And this is not a call to not think about your decisions any more.
It is a call, however, to embrace the fact that the future is inherently uncertain and that — whatever you think the future will look like based on your decision today — you will certainly be wrong to some degree.
Your decision today makes a difference. But so will each and every single decision after that.
There’ll be more meals after the cheese sandwich.
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